office supplies

I don't know if you know this, but I check my phone every five seconds hoping that you'll have texted me in the time I wasn't looking.
I realized realized a few days ago that im not your priority. I mean, yes, I'm not your priority, but you're a family guy, and im not a family girl, so yes they came before me. That was tough to chew because my familys idea of bonding is sitting together on the sofa on our phones. You'd choose that over me?no you wouldn't because your familys not like mine i had to keep reminding myself. but id choose you over anything i dont know if you know but i would. if you called right in the middle of dinner id leave and talk to you because anything to talk to you. anything.
you know, you're leaving.
when i walked in the door this evening, I was expecting my parents to say hi. I looked at them and my mom looked at me as I said hi and she didn't say anything to me. I gave her a hug and she still hadn't muttered a word, and my dad wouldn't look at me because he was on the phone.
yes this is my parents and this is how they treat me
this is why i want to move to maine
this is why i love you
because see i always mattered more to you than anything at college (except maybe your distaste for pda, but I didn't mind making you stretch your comfort zone) and then you went home
see, you're not with me anymore
see, it was just too hard to be around all these tempting boys without you here
see, i was very weak
i thought in my heart of hearts somehow i could make you come back
by acting sad
by crying to you
but of course my blind eyes didn't see that all you could do was cry back
and say that you were sorry
and that we needed to be over
for my own dear good
dear God,
God why did you give me him
i prayed for him but God why did You give me the best gift ive ever received and then steal it away from me
i thought You were finished doing that
he loved me
but sometimes i wonder if he loves me still
because he shouldn't anymore
because, see he's leaving
I think yesterday was too much
i was the one who said it somehow though
we cant do limbo
we cant do limbo
i cant do limbo
you can do limbo just fine there aren't 15000 other females up there with you
but i can't do limbo because there are 15000 other males down here with me
but id give anything to be away from the 15000 other males down here
and be up there with just one you
i cant halfway love you and then say goodbye to you when i've found someone better
thats not how this thing goes
you see, you loved me
but its loved
see, he wont say i love you to me anymore
and somehow that makes our love just like
see, we're just best friends now
emphasis on the just
because somehow we don't have now what we had
and the just conveys that appropriately to him
and to me its cold water in my face
because we had something
me, i had something with someone else
who had it with me back
he loved me
loved me for some strange reason i still can't figure out.

we had something made of cerulean colored flowers and sweet peaches
but now we have something made of cardboard and empty envelopes