Dear Future Husband

Hi!

You probably don't know me yet, but my name's Sue. I hope I'll meet you soon! I think I dream about you sometimes. When I wake up from a nice dream with someone else in it talking to me or holding my hand I try to remember the face but it always seems blurred out. I like to think it's you. I see little pieces of you places, like when Parker got up and bore his testimony in seminary and nobody was expecting it, or when Spencer's shoulders shake when he laughs. In the way that Carter's eyes scrunch up when he smiles or in the way that Tyler used to look at me out of the corner of his eyes and half smile mischievously. I see you in the way Mr. Manson talks about his wife, and how she grows more beautiful to him every day. 

I hope you know that I just want to be held when I cry, and I'll try not to get too many tear stains on your shirts. I hope you're not scared away by my weird family (you probably won't understand half the dialogue unless you were born in the early 90's). 

I like to debate in my head whether you'll have green eyes or blue ones and if you'll have curly hair or not. I wonder if you're the oldest or youngest or middle child (I'm almost the youngest) and how many brothers and sisters you have. 

I like to think about you at night while I'm lying in my bed and if you'll want a big family or a small one (I hope you want a big one:) I like to imagine the scene where I announce to you I'm pregnant and your eyes get all big and you have to sit down, because we're having twins. I like to think about when we're young parents with three or four kids and we're putting them to bed and you read them a story as they sit in your lap. After you tuck them in all snugly and kiss them goodnight while I sing the song my mother always sang to me and kiss them too, we'll leave together and just peek through the crack of the almost closed door until they're all asleep.  

That's a long time from now but I can't wait for it. 

I hope you're out there thinking about me once in a while. And I really do hope it really is you in my dreams. 

Love, 

Sue